«Wow.. looking back at this I must have been so frickin lazy xD»
«Definitely needs to be tweaked a bit. Not saying I could do any better but you couldve cut some of the scene out so it would be just silence most of the time. And I found a lack of sound effects present and some not much music, but the camera work although most of it was preset was very well chosen and gave the movie a chillier atmosphere as well, overall not bad but could be better just by being edited a little better. Hoping to see more from you sir and maybe i'll taking lessons from your films one day.
Not bad though, greatest of your films definitely.
«The subconscious mind can do many things including making us fight ourselves.
A pretty good film but it does need some fine tuning. The sound effects were lacking (no knocking sound, footsteps, etc). The phone scene dragged out needlessly (the character talked and then there were the extra animations making you believe he was either listening or talking but there was silence)
The choice of sleeping in a robe seemed odd but I guess some people do that.
Overall a good film but it did have some issues. Nice job though.»
«Really nice idea and I enjoyed the script.
Thought the camera work was quite nice and the VO's were good.
To improve, I would work on your editing; some bits dragged on a bit. You could also try adding more sound effects and music to suit the horror-thriller atmosphere.»
«For a first “talkie” the voice quality was great and I compliment your direction to your VO actors, also great cinematography (camera angles). As a previous comment said below make use of sound effects. The scene with calling the doctor, have a phone ring before doc picks it up. Hammering the stake, need wood pounding sounds, etc. »
«Yeah, I agree with Joseph and Joster...good first effort, but room for improvements.
You have a great idea here, but it could have been edited together a lot tighter...you could shave a further 1 or 2 minutes off this and the movie would be better for it.
For example, the gaps in between conversations could be shortened, speeding up the action and making everything feel more tense and urgent.
We don't need the silence while he's listening to his doctor...we get it.
You've added enough dialogue for the audience to understand what's going on.
There are some good sites with freebie sound effects that you could visit too...knocks on doors, creaks, laughter etc would have added greatly to the overall atmosphere.
On the whole, good first effort and I look forward to more:-)
«Thanks guys I appreciate that, I do realize that the isnt dialouge for some parts while a characters move, but that only happens under three causes, 1: I could not work around it without messing up the film a whole lot 2: A line from Dr. Thomas and Nightmare Alex decided not to work after being rendered from the windows movie maker, I didnt think to check if all the audio got through because I heard them when they went through the update audio on the game itself and I watched the saved movie file after export out the game but not after being rendered... I should have and 3: This example is from the beginning of the film when Alex is on the phone with the therapist, the silent parts were just him listening to his doctor but due the workload of Benjaminz I could put anything because it would have been too much for him to do but I thought you guys would get that hes just sitting there listening but I guess not. Well thanks for you review and thank you Joster once again for your VO's I would gladly use you again for another project.
«Not too shabby. It had a great concept & a great atmosphere, but I felt that certain parts dragged on too long and, agreeing with JosephKW, it is pretty odd when a charater is not talking while he is flailing his body around for no apparent reason.
Other than that, if was pretty good.»
«Nice job for your first "talkie". You did a great job in casting the parts, and I enjoyed the surprise twist ending! I do have a few suggestions for your future talking films (my attempt at constructive criticism). When editing the dialogue scenes, try not to have the character moving unless he's talking--otherwise it's odd to see a character wave his arms about and nod his head with nothing happening. As for the dialogues themselves, they're pretty good, but you might consider not having the characters speak aloud what their thoughts are. For example, a person won't really say aloud "I think I should call up my doctor and ask for advice"; just have the person call, and tell the doctor what his problem is. The same goes with him waking up and saying "Oh, what a horrible nightmare"--instead, just have him sigh with relief since the audience already sees him in bed and understands it's only a nightmare.»
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