«hahahahahaha. Nah, but seriously, what a fun movie! I haven't seen very many good comedies, and this was one of the few.
Story/Script: The story, though a bit unreal, was a good one, and original for sure. Tom was a strange character but one you can understand and pity. Penny was alright, but one problem with her is that she hits it off so fast with Tom. For God's sake, she's a criminal, isn't she? Isn't the point that she would want to get away from him as soon as possible, considering he seems to be kind of a dweeby guy? Most of the jokes made me laugh, though some fell a bit flat ("We don't serve genitalia". Some lines may be a bit too obvious or with too much emphasis as well. But I'm probably taking it too seriously: It's a funny movie, not Citizen Kane.
Screenplay/Camera: Here's where you had a lot of problems. First off, the talking and the camera shot were often out of sync, with the focus on Penny while Tom may be talking, for example. The way to solve this is to get outside editing software, because sometimes the in-game on doesn't cut it. You can add multiple clips of the same shot and then with your second editor make it so that the focus is on the character speaking. It doesn't really matter if the lip-syncing effect is lost; it isn't really that important. You can also use freecam a bit more, especially with the talking, which really seemed like it was the same shot over and over and over and over...
Acting: All the voices were fine, though I particularly liked Joe the Bartender's voice, which was pretty funny.
Sets: My only qualm if why you used the field set for the hot dog vendor. Was it due to shot restrictions? You could the blue screen with a backdrop if there are some that aren't available.
Costumes: They were fine, except I think you had a little technical problem with Penny in the car chase, whose hair changed styles and stripped down to her lingerie in the car. That must take skill.
Music: Maybe a little ambiance during dialogue, but the piano interludes were nice.
For the editing software, I'd recommend Sony Vegas 8, which may take some practice to use but is a great tool. Oh, and YOU DEFINITELY CAN'T DOWNLOAD FOR FREE ONLINE, NUDGE NUDGE.
Overall, a good comedy which shows promise of greatness in the future.
Check Please: Episode 2: The Convict!
Duration: 14min 35sec Views: 1 754 Submitted: 9 years ago Submitted by:
Description: Greetings Forumnites to my second episode to my Check, Please! Television series. Synopsis: Tom Zeebee sets up for his new date and at the same time a criminal by the name of Penny Stone escapes from jail. Unfortunately, Penny Stone somehow lands in Tom Zeebee's lap, and Tom thinks that Penny is his date. What will happen in this new episode of Check, Please? Will Tom get lucky, or will everything go haywire? Only time will tell! Cast: Tom Zeebee played by Stephen Sanders Joe the Bartender played by Stephen Sanders Penny Stone played by Bella Mrs. Zeebee played by Bella John Hamburg played by Jorge Dean played by Jorge Melvin played by Jorge Captain James played by Jorge Hot dog vendor Mike played by Yami Customer’s 1 and 2 played by Yami Veronica played by TPK Sounds: Schrieb Uzi sound Bullet_Ricochet_Short_a: Soundsnaps.com Bullet_Ricochet_Long_b: Soundsnaps.com Bullet_Ricochet_Short_b: Soundsnaps.com Pistol shooting 3: Soundsnaps.com Clothes jeans take off: Soundsnaps.com Music: Beatnik by Five_Mix_Colors Alan’s music stopper Pizzicato by Ehma Vingt_Neuf Janvier by Renald_De_Matrexasse Mighty and Meek by Kevin Macleod from Jamendo Sounds like a party to me by Sgporshe Xcyril’s-alter ego-max s’introduit chez zeger et commence a fouiller Impending Boom: Incomputech Sunshine: Incomputech Night Cave: Incomputech Overlays: A TPK production presents: TPK; image of a kitty in a poptart box courtesy of msn images. Check Please: Episode 2: The convict: TPK Darkness overlay: Cdg If I forgot anything, or anybody, please let me know, and I’ll fix it. Thanks! Enjoy! TPK